Written on : 2011-08-12
Guys don’t always get hard or stay hard. Guys don’t always get off. But pleasure can be more than a hard dick or a cumshot!
Trouble getting or keeping an erection can be caused by a whole range of factors: physical, mental, and more.
Sometimes guys have erectile difficulties when they use a condom, which can prevent them from using it, or cause them anxiety when they use one.
For older guys, they might think erectile difficulties are just an inevitable part of aging, but it doesn’t have to be. Erectile difficulties can affect guys of all ages, and aren’t necessarily related to age.
Tips to get hard and stay hard:
- Try foreplay, dirty talk and porn.
- Take your time and don’t hurry.
- Try different positions to see what gets you off and avoids discomfort.
- Use a lubricant. Silicone-based lubricants don’t dry up as quickly as water-based lubricants, which can help reduce anxiety about taking too long to get off. Experiment with different kinds on your own, to see what types of lube you prefer. Oil-based lubes make condoms break.
- Use a cock ring. They are available in a variety of materials. Choose ones that don’t fit too tight when you are hard, and are easy to remove. Many guys use them. They will enhance your orgasm, as well as your erection.
- Try sex in the morning, or at another time when you might be more relaxed or horny.
- Too much alcohol or drugs before sex can make it difficult to get hard and stay hard...
- Look into the side effects of medications you’re taking, but don’t stop taking medications without consulting your health care provider.
- Believe it or not - getting hard after eating a heavy meal is not easy for many guys.
Talk to your doctor if none of these strategies work. Erectile difficulties could be a symptom of a bigger health issue, or a medical issue on their own. Erectile drugs, including orals and injectables, are an option, but aren’t a magic bullet for everyone. On the other hand, many guys are able to use a condom with erectile drugs that otherwise wouldn’t and they report that they appreciate the freedom and anxiety from having to worry about staying hard. Know the side effects of these medications and what you shouldn’t mix them with.
You don’t need to get hard to get or give sexual pleasure. Try other kinds of sex play that don’t require you penetrating your partner with a cock, like:
- Oral sex, mutual masturbation, etc.
- Dildos, strap-ons, and cock sheaths.
- Try bottoming. (If you’re trying to be a bottom for the first time, read the section on Guys on Top.)
For more support and ideas, talk to other guys, check out resources and workshops on sexual pleasure, as well as trusted sex shops.